Right now Brett Favre is on his way to "get revenge" on the Green Bay Packers. Somehow people think that him winning a Super Bowl is "getting revenge" on them. The Purple People Eaters are just two wins away from getting their elusive first Super Bowl win. That doesn't matter though.
If you watch NFL Live or any similar show you should notice that the content is 90% Brett Favre already. The Brett Favres' are 2 wins away, not the Vikings. Imagine the shit storm of Favrism that will hit ESPN and CBS harder than Katrina if the Vikings make the Super Bowl.
Think about it...
Now think about the apocalypse that will occur if it is Favre vs. Ex-Favre, aka the Jets. Now I'm rooting for the New York Jesters to troll their way to a Super Bowl victory a-la the 2007-2008 New York Giants. So for me the best way to prevent this shit storm from arriving is to do everything in my power to make the Vikings lose. Unfortunately for me I will not be anywhere near the game this weekend. All I can do is pray to every God in existence, and cancel Favre's Prilosec OTC subscription so his esophagus explodes on impact with a bacon burger.
That is why I'm asking for help. Anyone who reads this and is in New Orleans this weekend please, for the love of everything holy, sacrifice yourself, your family, your freedom to stop Brett Favre. Pull a Tonya Harding and bash in his leg, or hire someone to do it. Get him sick with H1N1. Do anything in your power to stop the Vikings! The most legal route may be to lobby the NFL to allow the Saints to sign any player to a one game contract so they can hire Chris Johnson, Ed Reed, Darrell Revis and the likes to boost their team.
This isn't for me, this isn't for the Packers, the Saints or the Jets. This is for America. This is for you.
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